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Looks like Al is not the only one with bad days around here!
Even though today was a pretty bad day the whole week in general has been bad. My printer died on me, I wasted a lot of money on ink and paper and I couldn't do a proper class because of it.
Yesterday and today were definitely the worst days at my job yet. I simply CANNOT tell the kids to work on their individual notebooks because otherwise they lose it and its chaos at the zoo. All that we need is crap flinging and we are set...
Seriously though today was really, really bad. One girl started crying because I separated her from her friend, despite the fact that all that she was doing was being a pest, one kid REFUSED to be seated inside and only worked around, a group of girls just started doing whatever the hell they wanted and no matter what I did, said or even threatened to do I just lost them completely...
The worst part is that this leads me with my confidence shattered and I wonder if the problem is me or the kids. I didn't have days like this before. In fact up until this week things were running very smoothly!
I think that once I have an organized class from start to finish they finally begin to roll on. But since my printer was on the fritz I relied on the course's guide book and told them to do the exercises. This doesn't work at all because then I have 8 kids screaming to get my attention just to find out what "touch" is.
The only bright light in this is that...
1. My boss is very considerate and understands the situation. She understands that an after school program is likely to create antsy kids, especially since they are in school since 7:00 AM and leave at 5:30. That's harsh. I always refused to start in school after it was over so I can understand how they must feel, especially when they have me as a teacher (I give them a lot of work that keeps them occupied till time is up). The only suggestions she offers is to try and reward their GOOD behavior once they actually finish their work. Bah, I never believed in rewards...
2. Funny enough ALL of the classes were terrible. Apparently all of the teachers were having the exact, same discipline problem with their students, so at least I am NOT the only one.
I think this affects me so personally is because when I was doing my practical I was working so hard towards making a good class that when my teacher grabbed me by the arm and pulled me into her chair and told me I was doing everything wrong, it was one of the most humiliating and traumatizing moments of my life.
This is what I worry about: I try to be as fair, open minded and balanced as the curriculum allows me to. I try to incorporate classic schoolwork with new methods of teaching. I often feel as if college taught me a highly romanticized view of public education and not enough skills to take care of these discipline issues.
So, am I worthless as a teacher because one kid refused to do his work and started lashing out? Just exactly what am I doing wrong? The good teacher doesn't work. The bad teacher definitely doesn't, so what does that leave me.
The reason why this gets me so much is because at the end of the day I feel as if I wasted my time trying to discipline and not enough time trying to do what I was taught; teaching the fundamentals.
Everybody from relatives to teachers at schools and higher ups have said that I have the makings of a great teacher in me because I am smart, creative, empathic and fun. But how is this possible when a bad day like today happens? Where does the romance end and reality begin, and vice versa?
I guess the real question to this is; Am I a good teacher? Am I doing a good job? Despite the circumstances are my intentions and ideas well placed?
Its just a series of questions that keep bugging me because I am the type that wants to do well no matter what, and if I feel as if I didn't accomplish anything I keep wondering how can I improve on that. And if things don't change despite my intentions then what do I do next?
I also worry that this short experiences are the kind that mark my future career. I mean, if I do terrible with a small class how can they give me a job in which I take care of 20 or more? I already proved myself that I CAN teach a class of 20 adults and I feel confident about that. But how will this experience affect my whole outcome?
OK, this went on for far too long. But I guess you kind of understand what I am saying. I guess many of you have left wondering if you are actually good at your job after a bad day where nothing was solved.
I plan on toughening up. I only have two more weeks left, and by golly I wouldn't be surprised if they end up being my toughest two weeks yet. I definitely don't plan on giving up.
I am still alive after all...
-pap64
Even though today was a pretty bad day the whole week in general has been bad. My printer died on me, I wasted a lot of money on ink and paper and I couldn't do a proper class because of it.
Yesterday and today were definitely the worst days at my job yet. I simply CANNOT tell the kids to work on their individual notebooks because otherwise they lose it and its chaos at the zoo. All that we need is crap flinging and we are set...
Seriously though today was really, really bad. One girl started crying because I separated her from her friend, despite the fact that all that she was doing was being a pest, one kid REFUSED to be seated inside and only worked around, a group of girls just started doing whatever the hell they wanted and no matter what I did, said or even threatened to do I just lost them completely...
The worst part is that this leads me with my confidence shattered and I wonder if the problem is me or the kids. I didn't have days like this before. In fact up until this week things were running very smoothly!
I think that once I have an organized class from start to finish they finally begin to roll on. But since my printer was on the fritz I relied on the course's guide book and told them to do the exercises. This doesn't work at all because then I have 8 kids screaming to get my attention just to find out what "touch" is.
The only bright light in this is that...
1. My boss is very considerate and understands the situation. She understands that an after school program is likely to create antsy kids, especially since they are in school since 7:00 AM and leave at 5:30. That's harsh. I always refused to start in school after it was over so I can understand how they must feel, especially when they have me as a teacher (I give them a lot of work that keeps them occupied till time is up). The only suggestions she offers is to try and reward their GOOD behavior once they actually finish their work. Bah, I never believed in rewards...
2. Funny enough ALL of the classes were terrible. Apparently all of the teachers were having the exact, same discipline problem with their students, so at least I am NOT the only one.
I think this affects me so personally is because when I was doing my practical I was working so hard towards making a good class that when my teacher grabbed me by the arm and pulled me into her chair and told me I was doing everything wrong, it was one of the most humiliating and traumatizing moments of my life.
This is what I worry about: I try to be as fair, open minded and balanced as the curriculum allows me to. I try to incorporate classic schoolwork with new methods of teaching. I often feel as if college taught me a highly romanticized view of public education and not enough skills to take care of these discipline issues.
So, am I worthless as a teacher because one kid refused to do his work and started lashing out? Just exactly what am I doing wrong? The good teacher doesn't work. The bad teacher definitely doesn't, so what does that leave me.
The reason why this gets me so much is because at the end of the day I feel as if I wasted my time trying to discipline and not enough time trying to do what I was taught; teaching the fundamentals.
Everybody from relatives to teachers at schools and higher ups have said that I have the makings of a great teacher in me because I am smart, creative, empathic and fun. But how is this possible when a bad day like today happens? Where does the romance end and reality begin, and vice versa?
I guess the real question to this is; Am I a good teacher? Am I doing a good job? Despite the circumstances are my intentions and ideas well placed?
Its just a series of questions that keep bugging me because I am the type that wants to do well no matter what, and if I feel as if I didn't accomplish anything I keep wondering how can I improve on that. And if things don't change despite my intentions then what do I do next?
I also worry that this short experiences are the kind that mark my future career. I mean, if I do terrible with a small class how can they give me a job in which I take care of 20 or more? I already proved myself that I CAN teach a class of 20 adults and I feel confident about that. But how will this experience affect my whole outcome?
OK, this went on for far too long. But I guess you kind of understand what I am saying. I guess many of you have left wondering if you are actually good at your job after a bad day where nothing was solved.
I plan on toughening up. I only have two more weeks left, and by golly I wouldn't be surprised if they end up being my toughest two weeks yet. I definitely don't plan on giving up.
I am still alive after all...
-pap64
anxious
And you should have bought a laser printer! No need to worry about ink drying up and all that shit anymore!
Now that I have a new printer I'll create better classes and see if that does anything.
Oh, come Monday I will lay down the law and say they have lost many of their favorite things, like their crayons and coloring books and will say that they will get it back when they learn to behave, even if they don't want to.